I wanted to thank you for making me aware of my own pre-conceived notions.
While I know that other people don't think like me, it's most apparent on subjects where I'm explicitly aware of that. Like how people can't understand that I don't want to get a driver's license or don't drink alcohol or in fanish things, that I never saw romance between Jack and Daniel on SG-1, while obviously a lot of people do/did.
The notion that you'd want your romantic partner to be your best friend as well was something that I never really questioned. It made me positively giddy when Obama introduced his wife that way and it's how I prefer my ships, but now I realize that this isn't necessarily how everyone feels. I've been mystified by huge fan following for couples that don't seem to have anything going for them but a superficial attraction and in particular that didn't seem to share a deep friendship, but now I see that for others this might simply not be a requirement for a romantic relationship.
I'm really sorry that you feel so frustrated by this and that you (sometimes) feel that the slash breaks up the friendship.
For me the friendship between John and Rodney is the basis of their relationship. If you don't have it, you've got nothing. I absolutely hate fics that have them go at it in one closet or another but otherwise have them be indifferent to each other. It makes no sense to me.
The reason I slash them isn't because I think they love each other so much it has to be more than "just" friendship. I think the friendship that we've seen the develop between them over the years is one of the most beautiful relationships I've ever seen on screen. I enjoyed the few friendship fics that I read a lot. And in SG-1 I enjoyed all the friendships on the show without shipping anyone (and I think I was a happier viewer because of it).
But on SGA, my personal reading is that there is more between them. And by this "more", I should clarify, I do not mean more love, but a different (romantic) aspect of love. In particular there's the jealousy they display-which I wouldn't naturally expect from a platonic friendship which shouldn't interfere with a romantic relationship-and my subjective impression that John is gay and pining for Rodney.
I have to admit one thing I'm not quite clear on is how you perceive slash as breaking up the friendship. I don't know of fics where they stop being friends, in fact often the fear of losing the friendship plays a factor in not attempting romance.
Or maybe you mean the element of "finally" when they kiss or have sex for the first time as if everything before that didn't mean anything. I don't think it is meant that way, although now that I think about it, it might appear so.
For me John and Rodney getting together is keeping a wonderful friendship and adding something else that had been missing from their life (not that you can't be happy without a girl/boyfriend, but we've seen attempts in that direction from both so I think it's safe to say that they wouldn't mind or even actively wish for a romantic relationship). Of course you could have the same by having John get together with Larrin or someone else and what we now have between Rodney and Keller. For Rodney's part I could actually be happy for him to have John's friendship and Keller as a girlfriend. But unfortunately with John, I cannot see him as anything but in love with Rodney and to me that means that in addition to the friendship he longs to express his romantic feelings for him. What I'm trying to say, I think, is that when John and Rodney get together you could see it as not all that different from McKeller and John/Larrin happening, in that both would leave their friendship untouched. (And for those of us that like the friends become lovers theme, it's even more fulfilling.)
Anyway, I just wanted to thank you for your insight and wanted to explain where I'm coming from in this.
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winterfish
no subject
Date: 2008-11-25 08:22 pm (UTC)While I know that other people don't think like me, it's most apparent on subjects where I'm explicitly aware of that. Like how people can't understand that I don't want to get a driver's license or don't drink alcohol or in fanish things, that I never saw romance between Jack and Daniel on SG-1, while obviously a lot of people do/did.
The notion that you'd want your romantic partner to be your best friend as well was something that I never really questioned. It made me positively giddy when Obama introduced his wife that way and it's how I prefer my ships, but now I realize that this isn't necessarily how everyone feels. I've been mystified by huge fan following for couples that don't seem to have anything going for them but a superficial attraction and in particular that didn't seem to share a deep friendship, but now I see that for others this might simply not be a requirement for a romantic relationship.
I'm really sorry that you feel so frustrated by this and that you (sometimes) feel that the slash breaks up the friendship.
For me the friendship between John and Rodney is the basis of their relationship. If you don't have it, you've got nothing. I absolutely hate fics that have them go at it in one closet or another but otherwise have them be indifferent to each other. It makes no sense to me.
The reason I slash them isn't because I think they love each other so much it has to be more than "just" friendship. I think the friendship that we've seen the develop between them over the years is one of the most beautiful relationships I've ever seen on screen. I enjoyed the few friendship fics that I read a lot. And in SG-1 I enjoyed all the friendships on the show without shipping anyone (and I think I was a happier viewer because of it).
But on SGA, my personal reading is that there is more between them. And by this "more", I should clarify, I do not mean more love, but a different (romantic) aspect of love. In particular there's the jealousy they display-which I wouldn't naturally expect from a platonic friendship which shouldn't interfere with a romantic relationship-and my subjective impression that John is gay and pining for Rodney.
I have to admit one thing I'm not quite clear on is how you perceive slash as breaking up the friendship. I don't know of fics where they stop being friends, in fact often the fear of losing the friendship plays a factor in not attempting romance.
Or maybe you mean the element of "finally" when they kiss or have sex for the first time as if everything before that didn't mean anything. I don't think it is meant that way, although now that I think about it, it might appear so.
For me John and Rodney getting together is keeping a wonderful friendship and adding something else that had been missing from their life (not that you can't be happy without a girl/boyfriend, but we've seen attempts in that direction from both so I think it's safe to say that they wouldn't mind or even actively wish for a romantic relationship). Of course you could have the same by having John get together with Larrin or someone else and what we now have between Rodney and Keller. For Rodney's part I could actually be happy for him to have John's friendship and Keller as a girlfriend. But unfortunately with John, I cannot see him as anything but in love with Rodney and to me that means that in addition to the friendship he longs to express his romantic feelings for him. What I'm trying to say, I think, is that when John and Rodney get together you could see it as not all that different from McKeller and John/Larrin happening, in that both would leave their friendship untouched. (And for those of us that like the friends become lovers theme, it's even more fulfilling.)
Anyway, I just wanted to thank you for your insight and wanted to explain where I'm coming from in this.